Hell and High Water

So i did it, i completed the whole 40 day challenge that i had set myself, over the time the reasons for doing it changed over the course of it but the end result really kinda worked i learned alot about life and the people who are in this life with us and those who are willing to walk by our side and those that will just cut and run when they feel like that is the best thing to do, i know that i have come through this and i feel like a better person on the inside and i have received so many compliment's on how i have been and what i have done i feel very good about what i have done and how i have changed im so proud that i have achieved my aim and i know that if i want to succeed at something then all i really have to do is want it and put my mind to it and i can now do anything, hell iv even lost loads of weight dropped down a jeans size or two as all of my clothes don't fit me any more which is a pain as jeans are expensive when you have no money as you spent it all on a new tattoo but i wanted it as the symbolises are really important to me and my life. Things can always go so well and so shit at both times iv gone through mass problems without trying to actually thinking that i had even done anything to cause a problem in the first place so it makes me feel like shit on the inside. If i lived in the states i would own a .44 by now and would make myself feel free. Hatred and love run so closely together its very hard to see what we really want. If you want to know more you know where i am. There is a darkness inside all of us.

+++Never say goodbye, Only say see you soon+++

Infernal Device

Well im blogging again so it's time to pour out some feelings. There are many types of people in this world from the asshole's that they give a shit about you to the battle brothers that will actually hold buy you through life, fair weather friends are the people that just use you until they find something new to play with. Iv lost alot of friends and watched them go in the past but since i started my 40 day challenge i have gained the respect that i wanted back from people who can see what im trying to do and who im actually trying to be, not some lazy fat shit that just watches movie's and fucks for fun, im a better person now and i have true respect from the people i care about and they show it back. I may have been a little hasty saying i never need slice myself again, but im booked in for another appointment with the tattooist so that should help me out a bit more. im drawing more and more lately i can feel my creative talents coming back i feel younger like i used to in the days when i believed in virtue and honour. With fate and love i will always be here to watch you.

+++Deus Ex Machina+++